Vicious Rants of an Angry Yellow Man

I was wrong about the Democrats coming up short of gaining control of the Senate. But then again I didn't think that Joe Lieberman still counts as a Democrat. It will be kind of awkward at the party conferences! I noticed that Lynn Swan lost his governor's race and Jim Ryun lost his seat in Congress. Both are Republicans. Heath Shuler was smart enough to run as a Democrat even though he was a Republican before and won with the momentum of the Democrats. This got me thinking about athletes as politicians. Here are some of my ranking of athlete politicians.

The three I like the best:
1. Bill Bradly. The ex-senator was All-American basketball player and played in the NBA. He was also a Rhodes Scholar. He was on a New York Knicks team that had such smart people as Dave DeBusherre, Jerry Lucas, Willis Reed and Walt the Clyde Frazier that the current Zen Master of basketball coaches, Phil Jackson, had to come off the bench not only during the game but during quiz contests as well.

2. Tom McMillen. The basketball star at Maryland was a pre-med student and valedictorian. But he was smart enough to forget about medicine and became a Rhodes Scholar. He played decently in the NBA and then became a Congressman. He is now a venture capitalist.

3. Gerald Ford. Of course I have to pick someone from U. of Michigan. Some would argue that President Ford was not too coordinated, having tripped getting off Air Force One and almost killed people with his golf shots . He was a great center at Michigan and graduated from Yale Law school. He only got 4 A's though at Michigan. This either means that athletic ability counts a lot at Yale Law or grades meant differently back then.

Three terrible politicians.
1. Jim Bunning. A Hall of Fame pitcher who threw no-hitters in both major leagues strikes out as a politician. Named one of the five worst people in Congress by Time magazine, Bunning is a confused old man. He squeaked out his last election win only because his original opponent was involved in a sex scandal and the replacement only had 600,000 to spent. Nevertheless, Bunning demanded that he conduct the debate by video feed with the questions given to him ahead of time. Then it was discovered he read the answers from a teleprompter. Despite his mental incapacity, Kentucky relected him.

2. Fidel Castro. It is unclear how good Castro is actually at baseball. Some have suggested that he tried out for the majors but I don't think that has been proven. But I guess he may have more influence on more people than any other former athlete. Unfortunately it is bad influence as his policies have hurt the lives of many cubans.

3. Fang Fengdi. Better known as Yao Ming's mother. You would not know it judging by the mild manners of Mrs. Yao today. This is a woman beloved by Yao Ming's teammates and some rivals such as Shaq. But at one time this 6 foot 2 former top notch player on the Chinese national team was a Red Guard official. She was responsible for chastising and sending many Chinese peasants into hard labor camps. Obviously, reflecting on what she did today, she would not repeat those actions. But an impressionable young person, even one with intelligence, can be manipulated into doing the unthinkable.

Three tough and weird guys.
1. Jesse "the body" Ventura. Comes from the fake sport of pro wrestling to the office of the governor of Minnesota. Actually had some good ideas but never really learned to compromise and could not stomach a re-election bid.

2. Our own Arnold Schwarzennegger. Shows the nation that a moderate Republican in a blue state can win in 2006. Of course he didn't have much competition. He stumbled quite a bit last year but has made a nice recovery. Unlike Ventura, Arnold learned how to compromise. Still, given how much money he is worth, I would hope he stops taking money from special interests as he had promised. Since he can't run for president, is he through after the next 4 years? I look for him to go against Barbara Boxer for her senate seat next.

3. Ben Nighthorse Campbell. Former Judo Olympian is the only pony-tailed, Native American senator from Colorado who can probably outlift Arnold and Ventura. Instead of war, we should sent these three to arm wrestle the leaders of other countries!

Three future politicians.
1. David Beckham. The British soccer star is on the down side of his career. He is wildly popular still in England and in the rest of the soccer-mad world. With his wife Victoria (Posh Spice) at his side, who would not vote for him?

2. Gary Kasparov. The former world chess champion is considered the greatest player ever so his intellect is not questioned. He is very critical of the government of Russia and is trying to find backing to go up against Putin. He has also spoken out against organized crime in Russia. He would make a great leader but his chances of success is nil because he is going up against communists and the Russian mafia. Plus he is Jewish!

3. Yao Ming. It will be 20 years from now but I think Yao can make atone for his mother's past. Despite not having received much formal education as he was trained to play basketball by the time he learned to walk; Yao is an intelligent, funny and thoughtful man. Having spend the last 4 years in the U.S. has enabled him to take an interest in the AIDs epidemic and various environmental issues. Obviously he has learned a lot about western capitalism. With his popularity in China it would hard for the communist party to deny him a spot in the government if he chooses to go into politics after he retires.